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Thursday, March 13, 2014

I crap you not, I am lost in the confusing names of Chinese dishes

Bowen Bao  
I grew up in Shanghai, China and had Chinese food up the wazoo everyday for the past eighteen years. I had rice up the wazoo, dumplings up the wazoo, and fortune cookies up the wazoo. (Actually no, you can’t find any fortune cookies anywhere in a Chinese restaurant in my hometown.) Since I came to the United States last semester, I feel I am like a bull in a china shop everyday in the dining halls and the restaurants. Due to Chinese people’s habits of translating everything in English to Chinese, I have to relearn every dish’s name. I learned how to order a burrito with Mitchell and my roommate quad Cam, as you have learned in Mitchell’s article. I stopped calling “queso” the “yellow stuff”, and learned that “agua” is hidden in the machine. (I always paid for water). Thanks to my buddies, my life just became so much easier! However, just as I thought I am on the right track, everything changes when I walk into a Chinese restaurant.

As a sequel to the burrito battle article, we got bored one day and went to a very fancy restaurant on South U. On the window of this restaurant, it’s covered with the awards won by Chef Jan. He’s won all the awards for best restaurant, best dish, and best chef for the past five years or so. We were pretty impressed and couldn’t wait to get in. Thanks god, I said to myself, and I thought that I would be a pro in ordering this time. But when we looked at the menu, I knew I was totally wrong. I shit you not, I have never heard of General Tso’s chicken in any Chinese restaurant before. Though later experience proved it is very dank, I am still so surprised that the Chinese here are a different Chinese. “The cooks aren’t actually chinese,” Mitchell whispered to me. I really wish I could go check my self in the back. (side story: Don’t try going to the restroom here. Quad Cam went to the john for so long that we became worried. He said it was quite an adventure, though he didn’t see Chef Jan.)

As our interest in Chef Jan grow, so did our interest in the menu. From my perspective, this is the only Chinese dish on the menu that ever existed in my mind: Kungpao chicken. Every cultural cuisine has its tradition of specific combinations, so no offense, when I saw the Kung pao shrimp, which seemed to be appeared out of the blue, it just makes no sense. And where the hell does Cashew Shrimp come from? I wondered. I was looking forward to try something new so I accidentally ordered a dish called Yu shan chicken. I wondered about what this Yu shan thing was, just as I wondered about queso. This should not happen in a Chinese restaurant, though. So Mitchell became a pro again, getting sweet and sour chicken. Look how happy he got after getting this dish.

Here’s comes to our real food tasting period. My dish is in sliced meat in brown sauce and some bamboo shoots. Oh! I almost cried out when I realised that this is a dish which actually exists in China, a very famous dish in Sichuan. The people there eat a lot of spicy food and there is one bad outcome: you would sweat a lot and probably get swamp ass. The main ingredient is pork in a fish flavoured seasoning. I sighed and looked at my Yu shan chicken, which should be pork, and took a bite. Honestly, it doesn’t taste bad. It is just sweet as hell. As I would realize more and more later, the Chinese dishes are all in a kind of “brown sauce”. It doesn’t have the changing flavour of different regions in China as I expected, but that’s okay. Who made this? I guess it is Chef Jan.

We also got to taste sweet and sour chicken and pepper steak, though they have no similarities to any Chinese dish I have ever had. In China, there is sliced beef with green peppers, but never would I have pieces of beef and green pepper. You might argue that it is the same, but I would not buy it. It’s like having chunks of cheese in a burrito rather than sliced cheese. I don’t like being sound too critical, but I am just totally confused in the Chinese dishes that I should be familiar with. I didn’t expect the Chinese dishes to blow my mind completely.

I have to say, though, according to our squad’s opinion, China Gate is a wonderful place to have lunch. The lunch combo is only 6.99 to 7.99, with wanton soup and white rice. Another tip here, according to Cam: you can make you own delicious brown rice by pouring soy sauce into it. Now, we thought Pancheros and this place were going to be our lunch places, but before we even settle down, a sketchy place near East Quad is going to blow our mind. You’ll find out more in my next article.

See you next time.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Mission Impossible

Rachel Wallace  
In the midst of a foot-and-a-half of sparkling white snow and frigid negative temperature winds, is there any reason worthy of venturing out into the arctic tundra that has become Ann Arbor? I can only think of one: a mission to find the BEST hot chocolate in Ann Arbor. Now in a city where there are dozens of adorable cafés and restaurants both big and small, this seems like a pretty daunting task. I’ll admit that I did have to contain my search.

My first stop was the obvious: Starbucks

I would be surprised if any hot chocolate lover has never tried this abundant drink. I will say it is pretty good. It is rich and dark without being too dark for the average person or child to enjoy. I certainly drank plenty before I finally decided to give coffee a try. All in all I might be biased, but I now find Starbucks hot chocolate pretty boring.

Next up I decided to venture into another U of M staple: Espresso Royale

Having had their plain hot chocolate before, I know that it is very similar to Starbucks. I therefore decided to try the frosted mint flavor they were advertising. It is important to note that while it is called ‘frosted’ mint the drink is in fact hot (don’t ask me why, I don’t know). The best thing about it was its price of $2.70, some of the cheapest hot chocolate I would sample all day. The mint was a different flavor than the peppermint hot chocolate that Starbucks offers and reminded me a lot of an Andes mint. It was interesting and I did enjoy it more than the artificial peppermint flavor of Starbucks, but it was a very strong mint and did overpower the chocolate. It was also overall a very, very sweet drink.

Now that I had visited the most obvious cafes I decided to venture a little further from State street. I decided to go check out Sweetwaters Café.

Here I sampled the classic hot chocolate, $2.65, and the candy cane cocoa, $3.50. The hot chocolate was very mild and very milky. I don’t recommend it unless your favorite part of hot chocolate is the whipped cream. The candy cane cocoa was more exciting. It was a white hot chocolate, which was different. The main flavor was the mint from the candy canes. I believe they used real candy canes because I swear it was like I was drinking Christmas! It was by far the best minty hot chocolate. The drink itself did not have much of a chocolate flavor but it was also not too sweet. I also swear there was a hint of coffee in it. It was a really yummy drink.

I made one stop that I was previously not planning on when I decided to get some lunch at Amer’s. I saw hot chocolate on their menu and thought, ‘why not?’ The hot chocolate there was very sweet. It was rich and tasted like dark chocolate and was topped with really sweet whipped cream. I had trouble finishing the whole thing because of how sweet it was, but it was tasty.

After visiting several cafes specializing in coffee drinks I decided to switch it up and try a place that specializes in chocolate instead. My next stop was Schokolad.

I recommend Schokolad (located on Main Street) for anyone who wants to get some really good chocolate - but I had never tried to order hot chocolate there. Sure enough, when I asked the lady at the counter she said they did in fact sell both milk and dark hot chocolate. I ordered one dark hot chocolate and proceeded to pay the whopping $5.30 pricetag. Now after handing over almost six dollars, I was expecting some top of the line hot chocolate. They did not disappoint. They went over to the chocolate fountains they use to make the chocolate and started filling up the cup. They then added milk to the mixture and used a crazy spinning whisk machine to mix it all together. In defense of the expensive price, the cup of hot chocolate was very big. It was practically a venti at Starbucks. It was also amazing hot chocolate. It tasted like I was eating a rich dark chocolate truffle. It was thick - practically like melted chocolate - but still drinkable. Even so, I do not think any one person would be able to finish the whole thing.

The highlight of my little trip around Ann Arbor was not surprisingly Zingerman’s.

I knew I had to sample the hot chocolate here once I found out that their Mindo hot chocolate is ranked in the top ten hot chocolates nationally by Food & Wine Magazine. It turns out that Zingerman’s Next Door has a whole hot chocolate menu featuring 5 very different types of hot chocolate. The only one I didn’t sample was the Zingerman’s hot chocolate although I have heard that it is very good. I tried the Mindo hot chocolate $4.00, the Mexican hot cocoa $3.50, the Chocolat Moderne Mayan eyes $3.75, and the Spanish drinking chocolate $3.50. My favorite was the Chocolat Moderne Mayan Eyes cocoa. It was unlike any hot chocolate I have ever had! It was spiced with cinnamon, nutmeg, chipotle and ancho chiles. During the first sip all of these spices overwhelm your senses then the ancho chile spicy aftertaste kicks in. I would recommend not getting whipped cream on it to really appreciate the flavor of the chocolate. The flavor was so unique that I just kept sipping it to try to figure out exactly what all of the different flavors where. The Mexican hot chocolate was similar in that the chocolate was spiced with cinnamon. The flavor was less complex though. The best way to describe the flavor is to say that it tasted a lot like Red Hots with a hint of nuts as well. The Mindo chocolate was also very good. It is the best classic hot chocolate that I have tasted. It is made with a course ground chocolate instead of syrup which leaves a nice texture in your mouth. The flavor of the chocolate is great and strong without being too sweet or rich. It is nicely balanced by the cream. The last drink I sampled was the Spanish drinking chocolate. It is served with a spoon in a cup about the size of a shot glass. This drink is really just melted chocolate. It is rich, dark, chocolaty and delicious. It is similar to Schokolad’s hot chocolate although it is even thicker. Make sure you finish it before it hardens!

So, after spending way more time walking around in the cold than any sane person should and drinking so much hot cocoa that I probably won’t be able to drink any more for a month, I have decided that Zingerman’s Mayan Eyes is by far the best hot cocoa this city has to offer, but one really can’t go wrong with any of their flavors. Now, next time you are walking through the cold snowy streets of Ann Arbor and it is absolutely vital to fill your mouth with sweet, rich hot chocolate to warm up- you’ll know where to go.

Friday, February 14, 2014

Gluten Free V-Day

Brooke Sweeney  
Whether you are celebrating with a special someone or on your own (there is nothing wrong with showing yourself some love!), there is a surplus of options for a gluten-free Valentine’s Day. From candy to restaurants to recipes, there is no need to be intimidated by preparing a Valentines Day for your gluten-free sweetie or self.

If your Valentine’s celebrations will consist of treating your loved one with yummy confections, consider some gluten-free candies. I was delighted to see that some brands of the beloved conversation hearts are gluten-free, including Brach’s. The always-appropriate Hershey’s kisses are gluten-free as well, but only the milk chocolate version. Dove chocolates contain loving messages and are gluten-free; if you are into the cutesy colors and bite-size treats then look for milk-chocolate M&M’s. Of course, these are not the only sweets that are gluten-free: in fact, many quality chocolate bars are gluten free, including some flavors of Chocolove. There’s nothing more appropriate for Valentine’s Day than a chocolate bar with the words chocolate and love in the name.

Maybe your agenda for this celebration of love includes a dinner date. If so, check out some of these spots around Ann Arbor that are gluten-free friendly. For a casual romantic evening, try Silvio’s Organic Ristorante and Pizzeria, where you and your honey can share a gluten-free pizza. With their wide array of toppings you won’t be at a loss when ordering the perfect slice for your partner. Even better than the main course is Silvio’s gluten-free tiramisu. Even the name is sexy. This dessert features coffer-liqueur-soaked cookies layered with chocolate and whipped cream, making it a great dessert for your sweetheart’s sweet tooth. If you’re in the mood for something a bit fancier, head to Paesano’s Italian Restaurant & Wine Bar on Washtenaw. Look for the gluten free icon on their menu that denotes dishes that are or can be made gluten-free and pair them with an impeccable glass of wine. The menu also offers a selection of gluten-free pastas. Take advantage of this elusive dish and perhaps recreate the classically romantic scene from Lady and the Tramp.

If you are feeling extra ambitious and decide to make dinner, kudos to you! Your options are endless and you are in a good position to customize the meal to your gluten-free companion. For a delicious appetizer, try red wine infused cheeses cut into heart shapes. Salads are also a great option and can be dressed for the event with jewel red cranberries or pomegranate seeds. Pair your salads with some exquisitely prepared protein and you’ve got yourself a sultry meal. No dinner would be complete without the star of the show – dessert. Chocolate covered strawberries are always a winner and sinfully easy to make. Melt chocolate, dip strawberry – repeat. Once you have conquered your gluten-free meal, don’t forget to add they key ingredient: love! And while you’re at it, light those candles too.

Food is an inextricable part of the Valentine’s celebration - as it should be. The sharing of food is an intimate experience. Whether you opt for candy, a fancy dinner out, or a cozy dinner in – maybe all three? – enjoying a gluten-free V-day is not only an easy feat, but a labor of love.

Friday, November 29, 2013

Chocolate Time Machine

Rachel Wallace  
Theobroma Cacao is the Latin word for chocolate. It also quite accurately translates to ‘food of the gods’ - Carl Linnaeus, the scientist who came up with the name, sure knew what he was talking about! In case you didn’t gather from my last column, I love chocolate and believe that it absolutely makes everything tastes better. In addition to being a chocolate lover, I am also a total nerd. Therefore, I have always been fascinated with the events that eventually lead to the creation of the fabulous chocolate we eat today Do you know the history of chocolate??

It all starts with a brownish-purple, foot-long pod filled with seeds that on their own taste a lot like raw potatoes. Somehow, despite the unappetizing appearance and inedibility of the beans, there is evidence showing that the Olmec people of South America were growing cocoa beans as early as 1500 BC. Archeological evidence also indicates that people in Honduras would ferment the pulp into an alcoholic beverage. These early chocoholics knew a thing or two because today, the cocoa bean has to be fermented in order for the beans to taste remotely like the chocolate we all know and love. Later, the cocoa bean eventually reached the Aztecs and Mayans who believed this odd little bean contained magical powers. Cocoa beans were used as currency (100 beans=1 turkey hen or 100 tamales) and made into a bitter drink for festivals. Chocolate was also given to human sacrifices to cheer them up before their death. Eventually with the arrival of Spaniards in South America, the cocoa bean made its way to Europe where it was a drink exclusively for the rich. It was during this time, in the 16th century, when people began to mix in sugar or honey to sweeten the otherwise bitter cocoa. This hot cocoa, however, was quite different than modern chocolate. All the oily cocoa butter in the bean did not mix with the water so instead of being creamy, the first hot cocoa was gritty and had an oily residue on the surface. As delicious as that sounds, I don’t see Starbuck’s adding this to their menu anytime soon!

The next big development for chocolate came in 1828 when a Dutch chemist named Conrad Van Houten figured out a way to squeeze the oily cocoa butter out of chocolate liquor. The powder that he created is the same as modern cocoa powder. He also realized that if he added alkali substances, like baking soda, to this powder, it would more easily dissolve in water and smooth – creamy hot cocoa was born.

Once cocoa powder was created, the modern chocolate bar was not far behind. In 1847 the chocolate bar was created when Joseph Fry (a true genius) added some of the cocoa butter back into the cocoa powder to create a moldable paste and voila! Milk chocolate soon followed when Daniel Peter and Henri Nestle of Switzerland added milk powder to the chocolate bars. Now, there was no stopping the spread of these delicious new treats. Companies such as Cadbury, Nestle and Lindt formed and spread throughout Europe and America, paving the way for other chocolate companies that allow us to enjoy this food of the gods whenever we want!

Want to better understand the original chocolate treat? Here is a recipe for a form of the original Aztec hot chocolate or Xocolatl!

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Hello, is it Tea You’re Looking For?

Haley Fox  
Coffee or tea?

As historical as the fight between cats and mice, this internal debate is fought daily by drowsy commuters and students alike. This question often results in a more-or-less permanent siding with one of the two teams.

Those who love tea are fiercely protective of their morning brew. Yet given the prevalence of commercialized caffeine consumption (looking at you, Starbucks) and our nation’s own somewhat… watery history with the beverage (anyone in Boston up for a tea party?), it’s easy to see why a “cup of joe” has become the norm. Even my roommate, with whom I am cohabitable in every other aspect, brought her own mini coffee pot to make sure she starts each day off with a caffeine kick. It sits very prettily alongside my electric teakettle. I often ask if she wants me to steep her a cup, to no avail; she in turn offers me coffee, to which I politely decline.

It’s pretty clear that coffee drinkers like their coffee and tea drinkers like their tea. However, the benefits of tea go far beyond just the taste. Tea has been touted as “liquid wisdom” since its discovery, and extensive research has figured out why.

For all you coffee acolytes, here are a few key reasons to reconsider tea:
  • Green tea is loaded with catechins, which are powerful antioxidants that could help prevent cancer.
  • Tea may help prevent you from developing type 1 diabetes.
  • Drinking three to four cups of tea a day can reduce the risk of a heart attack.
  • The caffeine in tea takes longer to affect the body, so you can feel awake without getting jittery or worrying about a crash later on.
  • Black tea drinkers were found to have lower levels of the stress hormone, cortisol.
  • Tea contains fluoride, which is good for your teeth.
  • Tea is a zero calorie drink.
  • Although tea does contain caffeine, this drink is actually hydrating.
  • Tea is high in oxygen radical absorbance capacity, meaning it helps destroy free radicals that can damage your body’s DNA and cause wrinkles.
  • Drinking green tea daily could lead to about an inch off your waistline in 12 weeks, according to the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition.
  • Polyphenols in green tea may help prevent degenerative brain disease.

Although it won’t make you invincible, tea’s benefits far outweigh the nonexistent drawbacks. Be careful, though; bottled or pre-made tea drinks often contain an excess of sugar and very little real tea. Remember, I’m not asking you to cut coffee from your diet completely--coffee has its own health benefits, as well! But the next time you have to make your momentous morning decision, keep these facts in mind. You just might opt to skip the java.

Cheers!

Sources:

Monday, November 11, 2013

Fall into Chocolate

Rachel Wallace  
Chocolate Cupcake
Ah Fall. Definitely the best season in my opinion. The crisp air, the multicolored leaves, Halloween, pumpkins, and who could forget the fall food! Pumpkin muffins, caramel apples, apple pie, cider, donuts, cinnamon spice goodness, does it get any better?! One thing I have noticed, however, is the unfortunate lack of chocolate as a starring role in any of these fall delicacies, except of course in the Twix and Snickers bars that result from trick-or-treating. Now, I love Swix bars as much as the next person, but I, as a self-proclaimed chocoholic, believe there must be a way to blend chocolate with the fall flavors we know and love, because everything is better with chocolate! While home on fall break with access to an oven (the lack of which is definitely the hardest part of dorm living!) I decided to make a festive fall dessert but still have chocolate as the main ingredient. The result: chocolate pumpkin cupcakes!! I googled around a little and found a recipe that looked very promising from countryliving.com. The only problem was that the chocolate component of the cupcake came from cocoa powder. Now that’s ok but, in my opinion, cocoa powder never really gives a cake as much richness as good old melted bakers chocolate. To solve this problem, I enhanced the cocoa powder’s flavor with three melted bittersweet baking squares. I added it to the wet pumpkin mixture and stirred it in. Voila! They were perfect! Next, I decided to make my cupcakes mini. Mini cupcakes are the best because they have a better cake to frosting ratio, you can give them to more people (and let them all tell you how great of a cook you are), and you can eat just one… or four in a row, if you want to! When the cupcakes were done I frosted them with a classic cream cheese frosting (with a little orange food coloring just to be festive) and sprinkled crushed chocolate chips over the top. These little cupcakes were sweet, moist and both the earthy pumpkin and rich chocolate flavors blended together perfectly! Want to make them yourself? You can find the recipe here.

FYI:
  • You can add ¾ tablespoon of vinegar to your milk to create buttermilk
  • Add 2 squares of melted bittersweet chocolate to make them even more delicious
  • I baked my mini cupcakes for 11 minutes- the batter is very wet so they take longer than usual

Ingredients
  • 2 1/2 cup(s) All-Purpose Flour
  • 2 tablespoon(s) All-Purpose Flour
  • 1 cup(s) Good-Quality Cocoa (PLUS 3 squares of melted bittersweet chocolate!!!)
  • 1 tablespoon(s) Baking Powder
  • 1 1/2 teaspoon(s) Baking Soda
  • 2 1/4 teaspoon(s) Ground Cinnamon
  • 3/4 teaspoon(s) Fresh-Grated Nutmeg
  • 3/4 cup(s) Buttermilk (just add ¾ of a tablespoon of vinegar to your milk!)
  • 1 1/2 cup(s) Pumpkin Purée
  • 1 1/2 teaspoon(s) Vanilla Extract
  • 2 1/4 stick(s) Unsalted Butter, softened
  • 1 1/2 cup(s) (firmly packed) Dark Brown Sugar
  • 1 1/2 cup(s) Granulated Sugar
  • 5 large Eggs

Directions
  1. Prepare cake pans: Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly butter three 8-inch cake pans and fit each bottom with an 8-inch circle of parchment paper. Lightly butter the parchment paper. Set aside.
  2. Make the batter: Sift the flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, and nutmeg in a large bowl and set aside. Combine the buttermilk, pumpkin, and vanilla in a medium bowl and set aside. Beat the butter and sugar together in a large bowl, with an electric mixer set on medium speed, until fluffy. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition, until the mixture is smooth and light. Alternately add the flour mixture and buttermilk mixture, blending well after each addition.
  3. Bake the cake: Divide the batter among the pans and bake until a wooden skewer inserted into the middle comes out clean -- about 35 minutes. Cool the cakes in the pan for 20 minutes. Remove cakes and cool. (For cupcakes: Heat oven to 375 degrees F. Place cupcake liners in standard cupcake tins and fill each with 1/4 cup of batter. Bake for 22 minutes.
    (I baked my mini cupcakes for 11 minutes)

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Let’s Talk about Pizza!

Justin Hayworth  

If you are like me – or most of civilized world – you enjoy eating a juicy slice of warm pizza. Sophomore year, I ate pizza everyday for almost eight straight months. I may not be an expert on how to cook pizza like a master chef, but I know a good pizza the instant it hits my taste buds.

Which brings me to pizza in Ann Arbor, the city I have called home for the last five years. To the newbie Ann Arborite, the pizza options may at first seem overwhelming. But fear not, I am here to give you a complete rundown of all the best options for every possible pizza scenario that your daily life may incur. Let’s start on South U.

Three primary options satisfy the inebriated student’s late night pizza needs. The first is Backroom, an extension of the Brown Jug that has always been a personal favorite of mine. The options are limited - cheese or pepperoni – but at $1 per slice and $6 for a pie, the prices are hard to beat. Next comes South U pizza, popular among many of my friends, but I find the pizza overly greasy, which makes it increasingly difficult to eat with each subsequent bite. In contrast, I will happily eat two, three, even four slices of backroom’s thin yumminess before reaching satiation.

Rounding out the trio is Pizza House, an Ann Arbor classic. Pizza House is certainly tasty, but also extremely overpriced. Their best option, a Chicago Stuffed Deep Dish, will set you back nearly $20 for pizza that is just barely above average. Pizza House does offer a wide assortment of good pies, but better options exist for the same price; and, without a by-the-slice option, satisfying any late night munchies at PH will quickly drain your pockets.

Moving west, we land in the other campus haven for pizza: State Street. Late night options include Cottage Inn, Bell’s Pizza, NYPD, and Toppers. Bell’s is working hard to redefine mediocrity and should be avoided, as better options always exist. I find Toppers to be extremely greasy, and a little tasty, but certainly crave-able after a night out. NYPD is a sad imitation of its namesake, the iconic New York slice. Sure, the crust is thin and the slices a traditional 18”, but the sauce is tasteless, the oil excessive, and the toppings scarce. Much like Pizza House, I recommend avoiding NYPD as better choices abound. Cottage Inn, found at State and Packard, is my favorite late night option on this side of campus: serving up every pizza you can dream of, excellent calzones, and affordable specials, Cottage Inn is a frequent post-game addition to my apartment’s celebrations.

My two favorites, however, are The Original Cottage Inn and NeoPapalis. NeoPapalis brings a whole different style to Ann Arbor. The self-dubbed “makers of pizza” serve up artisan 12” pizza with delicious toppings on a thin and toasty crust that will keep you coming back for more. My absolute favorite option on the block, however, sits right next door - the Original Cottage Inn. Not to be confused with the franchise Cottage Inn mentioned earlier, The Original Inn is a full scale Italian restaurant. Their round crust large pizzas will feed several hungry men, and deliver a rare and perfect balance between sauce, cheese, crust, and toppings. They even put the toppings under the cheese, which blends the flavor into one big smile on your face.

My favorite pizza in town is found at Mani Osteria on Liberty. Like NeoPapalis, Mani’s pizza is an artisan sliced made from high quality ingredients. Most of the artisan options run at $15+ for a 12” pie, so save Mani Osteria for a special occasion and prepare to be amazed.

Other local late night, fast food options include Domino’s, Little Caeser’s, and Jet’s. I recommend avoiding all three like the plague: any of the local spots explored in this column are far better options in terms of taste, price, and value.

Overall, pizza is a lot like sex: if it’s good, it’s great, and if it’s bad, it’s still a good time. You cannot go wrong eating pizza unless you buy frozen or get from 7-11, and your tastes may well disagree with my own. I invite you to eat around and find your own favorites, using my guide merely as a starting point into a greater world of pizza!