Cheese for Breakfast

Caitlin Miller  

Below are the first thoughts that run through my head each morning:

1. What a nice sleep…
2. How can I incorporate some cheese into this day, STAT

Which brings us to: breakfast cheese. Gross, you say? Nothing could be farther from the truth! Cheese is an important part of breakfast dishes around the world, a tradition that is tragically lacking in America. I admit, the thought of digging into a hefty cheese mountain first thing in the AM is not a pleasant prospect, even for me. But while all cheeses are equal, some breakfast cheeses are more equal than others – and the right cheese choice before noon will do wonders for the mind, body, and soul.

Like exercise, eating cheese gives you endorphins, and endorphins make you happy. So why start your day off at a five or six when it could be rocking at a ten? Infusing just a little cheese into your breakfast routine will do this for you. This is not hyperbole; it is fact. Think about the high you get when you eat some mozzarella for dinner, or grilled cheese or pizza for lunch – only masochists feel compelled to deprive themselves of the same rush before noon. Look, your body doesn’t understand the silly taboos associated with eating cheese in the morning. It’s just a piece of hardware wired to understand pleasure and deprivation. And when you deprive your body of cheese because “it’s just not something we usually eat in the morning,” your body won’t be vibrating at as high of a frequency for the rest of the day.

Need more reasons why you should wake up tomorrow morning jazzed about eating some cheese? College is all about working hard and staying humble. Cheese is a perfect way to start your day because it is the very embodiment of humility: it could headline a Broadway play, but instead chooses to work hard on the sidelines, popping in here and there to accent dishes as needed. To paraphrase a quote by Saint Augustine: “You plan a tower that will pierce the clouds? Lay first the foundation of humility [by eating cheese for breakfast].” By the transitive property of “you are what you eat,” consuming cheese at breakfast gives us the perfect opportunity to meditate on those qualities we too hope to exercise throughout the day.

As I mentioned earlier, an issue that does sometimes arise with breakfast cheese is the question of density. The answer is simple: keep it light. And I’m not talking about cream cheese, which is listed in the dictionary as a synonym of ‘meh,’ which is a synonym of boring. Cheese is the food of the people, but it is all about indulging the whimsy and classiness in all of us: so none of this déclassé, middlebrow bullshit – let’s get creative. Over break I had a delicious goat cheese and spinach omelet. Goat cheese, the cheese equivalent of a cumulous cloud, delivers a lot of flavor and is a great way to subtly pack the cheese into an early morning meal. Another great option is Brie – slice some Brie finely and eat with a chopped apple or pear, and take your tastebuds on a one-way trip to Flavortown. Or, if you’re feeling especially frisky, a fresh ricotta cheese with honey is light, inhumanly delicious, and, most importantly, filling enough to get you to lunch with a smile on your face.

In short, there are two types of people in the world: those that enjoy cheese with breakfast, and fascists. Just kidding! But in all seriousness, if you find yourself in that first category, you’re doing it right; and if not, it’s never too late to learn!